my inbox

FROM MADAM ANNETTE.

Hello,

I hope this mail meets you in good time. However strange or surprising this contact might seem to you as we have not meet personally or had any dealings in the past, I humbly ask that you take due consideration of its importance and immense benefit.

I am Madam ANNETTE TRONIER HARTMANN ANOES of Swedish nationality and the wife of late VALENTIN ANOES, an ANGOLAN BUSINESSMAN and a one time SENIOR MEMBER OF ANGOLAN RULING PARTY,West Africa.

I wish to request for your assistance in an urgent transaction. My late husband secured the sum of TEN MILLION UNITED STATES DOLLARS in a financial institution overseas.

I humbly seek your assistance to retreive this money for me and secure it in your country, invest the money for me in your country till i am fit .this i cannot handle myself because I was recently diagnosed of colon cancer and i am presently hospitalized,though the doctors says after  major operations, i will be out of bed but not completely cured. Do respond if you are capable of handling this project and i will detail you more.

You are also welcomed to ask any question you deem fit concerning me and the project.

A handsome reward awaits you for assisting me and also for investing this money on my behalf.

Awaiting your soonest  response.

Sincerely yours,

Madam Annette Anoes.

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Sorry I can’t help- I’m still waiting for the Nigerian king to ask for my assistance first!

Update: A simple google search has revealed Angola to be in south-central Africa. Donch know why Madam Annette doesn’t know that.

 

Scientists discover pot causes forgetfulness shocker!

 

TOK 101 by CZY

1. There are 4 main types of hellenistic philosophy- stoic, cynic, epicurean, and skeptic (the rest is insignificant drivel).

2. Nietzsche is boring.

3. Kierkgaard is confused (how can you be existentialist and Christian at the same time!?!?!).

4. Don’t try reading Principia Mathematica- it’s impossible.

This is an account of what I have gathered from my recent conversations with Mr. Chue, the devourer of philosophy books. He enlightened me on his book-buying sprees, and I quote, “Basically I go into the shop, and give myself a time limit for the time spent there, say an hour. Then I’ll head to the philosophy section and look at every title. I have a rule that I will only give myself 10 seconds to decide whether to buy it or not. After 10 seconds if I haven’t decided, I will move on anyway.”

Hardcore sia.

 

angsty

There are 15 people in my office. My warrant officer must like me very much.

1. Thailand.

2. SAF day parade.

WHY!?!?!?!

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On a lighter note, nice to see soldiers taking orders literally.

 

the greatest try of all time.

 

black or white

And so passes the Elvis of my generation. He was the greatest star there was. Who else could sing, dance, moonwalk, and change skin colour like him? The man was in the spotlight for 4 decades, and it’s sad that this incredible endurance wasn’t enough to last him his last 50 shows. I was rooting for a comeback of massive proportions, something like seeing GNR all together on stage again. But well, some things just aren’t meant to be.

RIP Michael Jackson.

 

11 June 2009- I passed driving! Biggest problem stemmed from being way too used to the army, as I asked for permission to change direction, and asked for permission to turn off the car engine at the end. Apparently that makes me indecisive. Thanks be to God, without whom I most certainly would have hit the vertical parking pole, which somehow does not like me very much.

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I’m doing AC reasonably proud in the daily CS/Dota sessions. Think army improved my shooting with the carbine. I can almost hear LTA Jeffery shouting at me whenever I spray by accident.

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The step-over is utilized to great effect in ballroom dancing. It is considered an essential move to learn. Maybe Ronaldo went for dancing lessons before picking up football? That’d explain the pink shorts, the theatrics, and yea, the step-overs!

Speaking of Ronaldo, I think we would have a decent summer if the 80 million quid is spent on Benzema, Ribery, and David Silva (optional). Of course, his transfer to Real could get screwed if he fails his medical. Then we could keep Ronaldo and let him rot in the reserves. Haha.

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Leaving for Tokyo tomorrow night and I have no idea what to bring. Clothes, shoes, underwear, socks, a jacket, toiletries, books, ipod, phone (?), camera, chargers… am I missing something here?

 

4-4-2=10

 

Malaysia joins South American Confederation

 

 

Since they can’t win the Tiger Cup, Malaysia has come up with a cunning plan to win something. The probability of Malaysia winning the Copa America is as high as fourfourtwo sorting out their geography.

 

Back in black

Taiwan was an interesting experience, where I lived, ate, and talked to regulars for a large portion of the 3 weeks I was there. Positives included long rover rides, ninja vans, and slacking with not a care in the world after exercise cut, while negatives included being stuck in camp more often than not, and the facilities which make you appreciate Singapore camps slightly more. (Hmmm, all this talk of positives and negatives sounds a tad too regular… dammit!)

Oh yea, to those who predicted I’d get lost during RnR due to my suspect mother tongue… HAHA I didn’t! I even managed to get the hotel to fix my bathroom lights! Power sia. 

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Having landed safely back home, another exercise has promptly begun, after which there should be no more exercises until ORD… YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

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Anyone who feels he/she should’ve been around when Zep were writing songs in haunted mansions and the Holiday Inn had Keith Moon’s car in it’s swimming pool should listen to this band.

Presenting the Stone Gods, born from the ashes of the Darkness. This is the start of something!

 

A 2am flight is…

tai wan le. 

Funny right? I can’t help thinking of Taiwan as anything other than the Chinese countryside depicted in Mulan. You know the bit where the Chinese soldiers are marching on to face the Huns?

Mountains in the backdrop, endless padi fields with hunched farmers erm, farming, buffalo and cows grazing (Melvin has kindly informed there are no cows), and of course little boys and girls with bound feet running around with scary-looking dolls. 

Somehow I think I’m going to be in for a rude shock, haha. I’ll be back with the answers!