Spaced Out

Since as long as I can remember, I have always been fascinated by space. What’s beyond our tiny blue planet? Are there really aliens? Are the brilliant photographs taken by the Hubble telescope for real?

Unfortunately, time, practicality, and a disdain for the physics syllabus have probably put my dreams to study the stars (or maybe even go to space?) to bed. 

At the risk of sounding emo, looking up at the stars every night fills me with regret; I killed my own dream back in year 4 when I elected to drop physics. I also get this feeling of being ‘trapped’ on earth, the speck. Could it be that amidst the dryness of the topic matter (haha), the keys to freedom (which I take to be exploring wherever) may be found? I suppose the answer would be that yes, it may be… but however, freedom may also be found in other places, because freedom is ultimately doing what you want, and is not simply confined to exploring the unchartered.

Also, freedom without purpose is rudderless, meandering through time, being there but not being useful at all. It might even get boring. So, I will probably feel much better when I start studying medicine, as the freedom to do what I want is coupled with a set purpose. In turn it is hoped that the inadequacy of my mind to juggle multiple feelings (as Hermione once said to Ron, ‘you have the emotional range of a teaspoon’), will result in me burying this sudden desire to pursue a childhood (and thoroughly impractical and useless) dream.

Once suitably buried, I will not regret the road not taken, as it would have been forgotten, and I would have reached the suitable standard of ‘maturity’ required to be acceptable in this grey, merciless world. 

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While my train of thought depresses, I take heart from the Lord, as He brings hope. Freedom and purpose can be found in Him as well. After all, is it not said that if you hold to His teaching, ‘you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free’. And unlike my rather failed dream to visit the stars, this hope has not been extinguished.

Life no longer seems like it will end in a train wreck.

 

Headaches

The end of the year is coming really fast, and I have so many things to do, gee, staying out really helps time speed up- gotta be careful or I might get dizzy. -.-

Firstly, I have to complete my UCAS, which is a problem. I don’t actually know which universities to apply to; they all seem similar in the sense that all promise much, are difficult to get into, and well… use UCAS. 

Secondly, I have to pass my final theory and book a practical test date. 

Next, I have SATs to do. Do not ask me why I signed up when I have little or no intention to go to Uncle Sam’s backyard, I’m abit hazy over why myself.

PLUS! I have 12 days of leave and more days of off to clear by 31st December.

^ In football, manager’s speak of having ‘good’ headaches. I believe this would count as one of them. 

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Earlier this year, I applied to UNSW and UWA in australia to pursue medicine. By God’s grace, I have managed to secure a place in both universities. However, this places me in another dilemma. Bright, cosmopolitan lights of Sydney or wombats and erm, more wombats in Perth?

I pray God grants me wisdom in my university choice, because I don’t think I’m able to sort out this mess of potential British and Australian universities myself.